My experience working with children

I never thought I'd find myself working with kids. I love kids but they could be a whole lot of stress with their temper tantrums. Yet, this experience has been quite an eye-opening one and here are five reasons why. 

1. A Child's Mind is Amazing

If you have never had a conversation with a child, I suggest you find a cousin or niece/nephew and make that happen. Children have the most vivid and rich imaginations. It has been amazing being able to dive into the mind of these kids and get a glimpse of how they see the world, void of societal norms and responsibilities. It almost makes me want to be a child again, almost.

2.  Optimism 

The optimism that beams from a child's eyes is refreshing. Working with children reminded me, that there is a silver lining and that silver lining is present in a child’s smile, in their openness and disposition.

3. Mentoring Helps You Grow

The assumption I had about mentoring is that it benefits mainly the mentee; but, I realized that you learn so much about yourself trying to help someone else get their life together. If done correctly, I believe that mentor should learn just as much from the mentee as the mentee does from the mentor.

4. Finding the Joy in Learning is a Lost Art

I thought all kids hated learning as much as I did when I was younger. However, I’ve realized that it is not the learning that I disliked, it was the environment. Seeing these children come to school excited to learn shows me that providing a safe and encouraging place for kids to come is very important. Fun and learning don't have to be mortal enemies.

5. Children Inspire Me

It is impossible for me to leave work without learning something new. The diversity in the students and their learning styles makes coming to work an enjoyable experience.  These children inspire me to do more with my life, so that I can better help them. Children have such an open heart and mindset that allows them to accomplish any goals. They inspire me to chase after my dreams.  This has to be the best part of working with children.

EASY WAYS TO ENCOURAGE AND LOVE YOUR SPOUSE!

Hi Lovelies....... It's been a while. I've so missed blogging and all my faithful readers. Sure we had a lovely val day. Few days back i was just reminiscing about so many things and February happens to be the month of LOVE as well. I just had this urge to encourage someone and I hope this piece blesses you.

Falling in love is sensational and sweet. But staying in love and cultivating a strong marriage... that's something that takes work. As husband and wives, you can't just go through the motions of daily life and expect the relationship to grow deeper. We need to roll up our sleeves, put our spouses first and actively demonstrate our love.

It's easy to think about and dwell on the ways that we want to be loved and encouraged better. Dear people, if we are to be imitators of Christ and godly spouse, we have to move from having an " I mindset to having " We'' mindset. In the heat of the moment, when life is busy, stressful or frustrating, we have to commit to choosing selflessness over selfishness and loving our spouse with everything we've got.

Here are ways to put loving and encouraging your spouse into practice.

•  Say thank you:  As simple as it sounds, it goes a long way in our marriages, even in our personal life's. How often do you thank your spouse? thanking them for the big and little things shows that he/she is appreciated.

• Tell your spouse why you love them, remind them often:  When we first fall in love, we make a point to tell someone why we love them, and we don't let them forget about it, either. But after '' I do,'' some of us stop reminding our spouse that we're still madly in love with them. We should learn to evaluate ourselves and write down first things that come to mind when you think about why you love your spouse. Maybe it's his/her smile, tender heart or whatever those reasons are, make it a point to remind he/she of those reasons a couple of times or  weekly.

•  Create reasons to laugh and smile:  I believe one of the best medicines for a joy filled marriage is laughter. A healthy couple is a couple that can be silly, laugh and poke fun at each other. You don't have to be a comedian. You can reminisce about a time when something hilarious happened, or try making fun of yourself. Just be you and make a point to celebrate the quirkiness of your marriage. It is what makes the two of you unique. 

• Don't try and force your spouse to be someone they are Not:  Love them for who God made them to be:  We can pray for our spouse to change. We can encourage them to embrace new ways of living and thinking. But we can't change the essence of who they really are. That's God's business. 

• Surprise your spouse with a date night:  There's something about getting all glammed up, going out, talking about life and being adults together. It takes one back to the time you first fell in love and it reminds you that dating shouldn't stop after the wedding ceremony. 

• Write a Note:  Whenever your spouse leaves to go for a trip, Always try to leave them a note in the morning letting them know that they will be missed and you hope they have a safe trip. Notes  are tangible ways to show love and in the digital world we live in, they are so rare and valuable. Surprise your spouse by leaving a note on a mirror, refrigerator or in their cars. A note is worth a thousand hugs. 

• Tell your spouse what you need:  No one's a mind reader. We show love to our spouse when we help them understand our wants, needs, desires, etc. 

•  Be genuinely interested in what you spouse has to say:  Our thoughts and agendas are not the most important things to be thinking about. Instead, we need to make it a point to listen to our spouse and show genuine interest in their passion and endeavors. Ask them what they want to work toward. This help build up their confidence and leads to deeper conversation, which ultimately brings a couple closer.

xoxo

Love Tank!

Hi fans, it been a while… I’ve so missed you all and I have missed blogging as well. Was speaking with a fan few weeks back who really expressed her love for the blog saying she can’t wait for a new post.  That really got to me. A big thank you to all those who showed concern one way or the other, just to know if all was well with me….I really appreciate. Feels so good to be loved! You guys really inspire me to write…I love you all.

So I will be discussing about ‘’LOVE’’. These four later word is so powerful. Love is the most important word in the English language and the most confusing. Both secular and religious thinkers agree that love plays a central role in life.  We are told that ‘’love is a many splendored thing and that it makes the world go round’’.
Thousands of movies, songs and books are peppered with the word.

Psychologists have concluded that the need to feel love is a primary human emotional need. For love we can climb mountains, travel far distance, and endure untold hardships. Without love,  mountains become un-climbable and hardship our plight in life.  The Christian Apostle to the Gentiles, Paul, exalted love when he indicated that human accomplishments that are not motivated by love are, in the end, empty. He concluded that only three characters will remain: ‘’Faith, Hope and Love. But the greatest of these is ‘’love’’.  

Most times we confuse the word love in a thousand ways.  We love nature: flowers, weathers etc. we love animals: pets etc. we love people: mother, father, siblings etc. we also use the word love to explain behavior. The purpose of love is not to eliminate all confusion surrounding it, but to focus on that kind of love that is essential to our emotional health. I like the metaphor that says ‘’Inside every child is an emotional tank waiting to be filled with love’’.  Much of the misbehavior of children and adults is motivated by the cravings of an empty ‘’love tank’’.

What good is the house, the cars, the place at the beach, or any of the rest of it if your spouse doesn’t love you? Material things are no replacement for human emotional love.  Something in our nature cries out to be loved by another. Isolation is devastating to human psyche. That is why solitary confinement is considered the cruelest of punishments. At the heart of mankind’s existence is the desire to be loved by another.

Some says love don’t exist, probably due to their past relationships or life events. Yes I myself have been hurt. Hurt by loved ones, friends and even family members. But never hold on to the past…I hear someone say ‘’yea right Juliet! Easier said than done… yes I know it’s not easy. I have been there; it was never easy at first. I just had to work on myself, put myself together and move on. Rather than dwelling in my past. Once we dwell in our past, we give the devil the chance to creep into our hearts and sow seeds of discord. Thereby we begin to walk in hatred than love.  When the tank is low… we have no feelings towards people around us but simply experience emptiness and pains. Could it be that deep inside hurting people exists an invisible  ‘’emotional love tank’’ with its gauge on empty? Could the misbehavior, harsh words, withdrawal and critical spirit occur because of that empty tank? With a full tank people will be able to create an emotional climate where it is possible to discuss differences and resolve conflicts.  Could that tank be the key that makes relationships work?

When you walk in love, you express the traits of God in you.  Love gives hope to the hopeless, it can brighten a day and it brings out the best in one. I can go on and on…

Love is friendship that has caught fire; it is quiet, Love settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weakness. When love is your guiding light, you can break through barriers to be of loving service to the world.

You don’t need a thousand people to like you; you need just one or two people to love you and that relationship can change your life forever. Love is when you take away the feelings and passion in a relationship and find out you still care for the person. ‘’When an action doesn’t come naturally to you it is a greater expression of love’’.

It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone an hour to like someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone you love.

     ‘’if you claim to have feelings that you don’t have, that is hypocritical… but if you express an act of love that is designed for the other person’s benefit or pleasure, it is simply a choice’’.  

Love comes to those who still hope although they have been disappointed…

 To those who still believe although they have been betrayed…

To those who still need to love although they have been hurt before ….

To those who have the courage and faith to build trust again…  Go show someone love today!

XOXO…

Planning A Perfect Proposal

Get it right, this proposal is not about YOU! Don't say you don't like public display of affection -nobody ever died from PDA. Remember, it's not about YOU! Proposals all over the world are a big deal and most girls have been dreaming about it all their lives, Let it be an unforgettable experience.

Here are major tips to plan a perfect proposal.

Surprise!

 Women love to be surprised, don't be careless about this thing. You are trying to impress your babe, don't fall your hand. Don't now leave the receipt for the ring in your wallet when you know she will be checking. Don't make phone calls in the toilet when she's in the same house. Give her the surprise of her life. You want tears of joy when you propose? then surprise her. Most ladies who cry during their proposals never esperrrred it! 

Be romantic

Nigerian men, romance does not equal money. Be creative in your approach. It's not everyone that can afford to fly to Dubai or Paris and catch a connecting cruise to the Caribbean proposing in the beautiful sunset. Cut your coat according to your material but don't just sit down and collect her hand and put the ring. Try small. Plan a theme. Make her mushy. Remember, this proposal is about HER and how you want HER to feel. Do you want her screaming YES! YES! YES!!! ? Then be romantic.

Choosing the bling!

 This is the biggest stress and once you cross this hurdle you can never do anything wrong. If you are a sharp guy you would already know the kind of ring your babe likes, women give HINTS a lot, if you don't know then you've not been observant. Check her phone, do you see a saved DP or screenshot of any ring? What instagram photos has she been liking ? That might be it. If you cannot figure it out, employ one of her loyal friends to help you. The proposal ring deserves to be lovely, don’t settle for a cheap ring, save for the ring.

Do it for the gram!

This is 2016, you HAVE to HAVE a professional photographer nearby to capture that moment she would LOVE it! That moment: you on one knee, her one hand covering her mouth, that big smile on her face or tears ruining her mascara and her friends snapping away is something you HAVE to capture for Instagram, snaptchat or facebook! That picture she would tag "I SAID YES!

Let Shut Doors Remain Shut! Don't Force Things.

Yesterday’s excellence is today’s mediocrity. Don’t worry about other people’s opinion of you. God never told you to impress them, only to love them. “Shut  Doors” we have seen the caution  sign on every door in every car, bus, train or rest room, do not hold doors open when they’re being shut.  Common sense right? Everyone should know that. I mean you could get stuck, you could get hurt. 

And it’s not even just about you; you delay the passengers on the bus going for an interview or to work!  Shut the doors and let the bus leave. The next bus is usually not too far behind.   Applying it to life: Life a journey from birth to death with all types of doors opening and closing? Doors of relationships, doors of friendships, doors of opportunities… If we were all very perceptive, we would see on every single door in our lives that same bold sign, “Shut Doors” In life and living terms, do not disrupt the doors’ activities. When they’re closing, let them close. When they’re opening, let them open. Do not force them open, do not force them close and please, do not break them down! If God shut a door, stop banging on it. Trust that whatever is behind it is not meant for you!

A lot of times we further complicate life by not letting doors be.  People have in actual fact lost their lives because they held doors that should have been shut, open. The truth is I still have trouble leaving the doors in my life well alone. I shut a door on a beautiful friendship and I kept telling myself “how can you shut a friend who wants to be there for you with no holds barred out? How can you deny yourself of the joys? I don’t get it”. Let’s just say that that second sentence played over and over again in my head and made me realize that forcing certain doors shut causes both parties pain.  Only time has been faithful enough to ease the pain and bring permanent relief. We’re friends again.

Three things come in very handy with regards to letting doors be. 

1) Perception.

2) Wisdom.

3) Self-control.

They let you see which ones are closed and which are wide open. They let you know when to be concerned and when to be unbothered. They make life pretty less complex.  Have seen cases when one friend emotionally checks out of a friendship but the other is still in it whole-heartedly, laboring and fighting for “normalcy” to be restored?

I wish I’d always had the wisdom to prevent me from having my own moments of standing between doors. Yes, I've had my own “experiences”. You know an experience made an impact on your life when years later, it’s still a point of reference.

 No one needs to repeat any other person’s known mistakes. Let the doors that need to be shut in your life be. Shut Doors and let them remain shut.  The solution to permanently numbing your pain is waiting it out. Every minute that passes is a minute closer to getting back to your normal self and hopefully a minute spent reminding yourself to next time stand your ground and reach out to people you've been blessed with.

20 Truths to Learn Self Love and Be Happy With the World!

A glad heart makes a happy face; a broken heart crushes the spirit. prov.15:13

Many people (including me) speak about “self-love”: figure yourself out, love yourself before you get into a relationship… and so it goes. People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be!

However, you only truly obtain self-love by having compassion for the self, so you can appreciate and do considerate deeds for others. You attract how you see life.

Along my path to learn about myself and work on my own self-love, I discovered several major truths that still resonate with me and support my personal effort.

I am a constant work in progress, as most of us are. To help you gain more perspective and have a foundation on which to begin your journey of self-love, it's time to start loving and liking you. Never let anyone make you feel less than you.

Here are 20 truths to always remember:

1. Stop comparing yourself to others. People achieve success and fail at different rates.

2. Let go of the past. Forgive the people who hurt you so that YOU can move on. Carrying around anger only poisons you.

3. Call your friends and family more often; don’t just follow them on social media. Remember when we used to have to call or meet up with people to hear their voices? That experience is so much richer.

4. Resolve the issues you might have with your family. Tell them you love them. Show up to family events and don’t have something better to do.

5. Be active. Exercising regularly releases endorphin's and contributes to your level of happiness and will help you feel better about yourself.

6. Laugh at yourself. If you trip over your feet or realize your shirt is on inside out, don’t worry about it and make it a joke.

7. Read that book you've been meaning to read. In fact, read as many books as possible. Reading expands the imagination and sharpens the mind.

8. Find something at which you excel. Maybe you are really amazing at working with kids and you just don’t know it yet.

9. Exercise because it is good for your soul and not solely for your outward experience. Appreciate your body and all the things it can do. Stop picking it apart — you will never achieve perfection.

10. Reunite with old friends from high school, college and your past in general. Let go of friendships that no longer serve you. People grow apart; it’s natural and it’s okay.

11. Watch that movie or that Netflix series you've been meaning to see.

12. Dance. Freak Dance. Weird Dance. Make up a dance routine with your friends. Stop caring about what you look like. Have fun.

13. Smile more. The more you smile, the happier you will feel. It makes others happier too — trust me.

14. Do favors and don’t expect anything in return from the kindness in your heart.

15. Guard your heart, but be open. Don’t let people take advantage of you.

16. Be less judgmental. “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”

17. You will never be able to please everyone. Not everyone will like you. You won’t like everyone you meet. That’s perfectly fine also.

18. Care about your appearance — not in a vain, superficial way. Care about how you look, so you can feel great when you leave the house. But, if you feel like wearing sweatpants and hair roller on your hair to the grocery store once in a while, do it.

19. Save up money and travel somewhere new. Spoil yourself on a vacation.

20. Take vitamins because you want to be the healthiest version of yourself. Unless you want to be cranky and lethargic all day, make sure you get enough iron.

Love yourself. Enjoy the live you have been given, and embrace each day with open arms as the best version of you.

Always remember this quote by Buddha:

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

Creative Ways To Use African Prints To Decorate Your Home & Office!

There are actually countless ways to use Ankara to add some African spirit in virtually every room in your home or at your office.

Ankara fabric has always had a home in many Nigerian wardrobes, but sadly, that is the only space it occupies.

Besides, ankara is relatively inexpensive but fairly durable, making it a great décor investment.

Another great thing about decorating with ankara is that its prints are diverse, vibrant, and colourful, meaning there is something for everyone.

Here are a few simple ways you can add some Afro sass to your home with this much-loved African fabric.

Dining:

A good way to incorporate ankara print here is to use a strip as a runner on your dining table, as the chair/ table cover or cut up some of it to use as napkins.

Lamp covers:

This is a great innovative way to brighten up the interior of your home.

Chair covers and throw pillows:

Basically you can be creative when mixing and matching colours for interior decoration using Ankara.
Monochrome coverings are out of fashion. Since Ankara is easy to launder, it is suitable for making scatter cushions. To give your sofa great visual interest, choose two or three pieces of ankara with different prints but with at least one or two colours in common.

Decorative ornaments/photo frame around the house and office:

There are so many other ways to use ankara prints your the home or office.

Curtains:

If you’re especially handy, consider making some curtains out of African fabric. Tip: Consider draping the fabric over your existing curtain rods to create a swag effect. This adds instant color and an African touch with minimal effort.

Bed shit and pillow cases:

This is an example of a contemporary bedroom with Ankara print. So lovely!

Plates and apron:

It then makes perfect sense that Ankara makes great aprons too and fruit plates in the kitchen.

Flower pots:

gives it a different look from the conventional flower pots.